22 & not a clue

So me and my 22 year old brain have been having a lot of fun over the past two months. More so than we have done in a long time. I mean I've been meditating, taken time to just be, achieved things I didn't even know were on the to do list - but is that statement part of the problem?

The 'to do list'. Is anyone else part of the percentage of people on this earth who live on plan A or B at any given point in time? And who can just 'live'? I didn't even know it was a concept until someone told me that not having a plan was just as much of an idea as having one.

After eight beautiful weeks in Thailand spent adventuring, meeting wonderful people and doing whatever took my fancy at a moments notice I have returned to London. With a bang. I am sleeping on a friend's couch and pushing myself harder than ever before to make my break in to the PR industry happen. Now is my time and it's gonna happen. The To Do List is a mile long and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't daunted. However, what I learned in Thailand has stayed with me; when we stop making plans and simply ask ourselves what would we like to do or achieve today, we begin to please ourselves.

Taking time to please yourself, however that may be, from a whim to a goal is part of contentedness. Furthermore it means when you take up the yoke of all those ambitions and goals again the load doesn't feel as heavy as before.

Push yourself, strive for the great heights, just don't forget to spend a day reading a book or take the time to run a bath. 

What a curious thing it is to consider that part of your life, a chapter if you like, is over. Published and done with. I will never drive around in cars with Gerry or Brian like we used to. I will never have cause to sit in a Lurgan car park of a Saturday night smoking a 'bine', trying to keep up with the slang. I will not catch another boat to Stranraer to see that lover, may his acne never go away. Lastly I will most likely never catch another Frankston train home to see family I hardly know but love all the same. These periods and habits are done with now and I have outgrown them all. The are both past and passed.

A sure sign of spiritual growth is when you want more freedom and less stuff. I am not taking anything back to London with me unless it is vintage or second hand. The thought of buying furniture is giving me hives, I can't shake the feeling that I am not done yet. The saying